Champions: Version 17.0

Someday, when I'm old and gray and eating creamed corn for breakfast, lunch, and dinner at the nursing home, I will think back on these days, these glory days for my sports teams, and I will smile. In 2004, I had the Red Sox, who won a World Series title after an 86-year drought. Then the New England Patriots, at one time the most hapless team in football, won three Super Bowls in 2001, 2003, and 2004 (and nearly another one last year). Though, I should add that the Pats are not really my team -- the Oakland Raiders are -- but that's neither here nor there at the moment. Then the Red Sox again last year, which was good, because I don't think I could have waited another 86 years. While we're at it, let's throw in Italy winning the World Cup in 2006.

And tonight, TONIGHT, the Boston Celtics won their 17th NBA Championship, their first since 1986, ending a twenty-two year drought. It's a beautiful thing. When I was growing up, the Celtics were expected to win year after year. With Hall of Fame players like Larry Bird and Kevin McHale, great players like Dennis Johnson, Danny Ainge, Robert Parrish and Cedric Maxwell. They won three championships in 1981, 1984, and 1986. Up in New England, we took it for granted. We came to expect the Celtics to win. We thought they'd ALWAYS win and that the good times would never end. But they did, quite abruptly in fact. As soon as that '86 banner went up in the old Boston Garden, it was as if someone took the Celtics Leprechaun and shot him in the head. Their number one pick in the 1986 draft, Len Bias, died of a cocaine overdose, two days after the Celtics selected him at No. 2. Then Bird, McHale, and Parrish got old and retired. Then, in 1993, their best player, Reggie Lewis, collapsed and died of a heart condition at the young age of 27. That wasn't even rock bottom. Though they picked up a couple of decent players, most notably Paul Pierce, the team sucked for the next decade and a half. Oh yeah, I forgot. In September 2000, Pierce, the best Celtics player since Larry Bird, was stabbed 11 times in the face, neck, and back at a Boston nightclub, and nearly killed. It was a miracle he survived. THAT was probably rock bottom.

So it's been a long time coming, a long walk in the wilderness. And tonight I'm happy. Most of all for Paul Pierce, who suffered though some atrocious seasons, especially last year's when they only won 24 games all year, and re-signed with the team before they got good again. For Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen, both of whom played on bad teams of their own and never won a championship until tonight. For the unsung guys, Leon Powe, who was homeless as a child for several years after his family's house burned down; P.J. Brown, who came out of retirement to make some big shots; James Posey who made some HUGE shots in the playoffs; and Eddie House, who came up big off the bench; and most of all, for my favorite player, one of the youngest and shortest guys on the team, and easily the most-criticized, point guard Rajon Rondo, who never gave up, even after being benched and who had something like 8steals to contribute to this massive 39-point blowout tonight against the Lakers. You can have your selfish, me-first Kobe, I'll take Rondo any day of the week.

Last, but not least, big props to General Manager Danny Ainge, who orchestrated the megadeals that brought over Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen (with a colossal assist from GM Kevin McHale of the Minnesota Timberwolves, who I do believe is still a Celtics fan) and coach Doc Rivers, who everyone wanted fired last year, but who proved his skill and value this year. Sometimes it's the players folks, not the coach.

The Boston Celtics are World Champions again. I can't fucking believe it.

Light the cigar, Red, wherever you are.