Cue up "The Super Bowl Shuffle," folks, the Chicago Bears are going back to the Big Show after 21 years. I was actually hoping for a replay of the 1986 Super Bowl, but alas, the Patriots exhausted their good fortune in Indianapolis tonight, and it will be the Colts playing the Bears, not the Patriots. I'm happy for Peyton Manning and Tony Dungy, both of whom are class guys. Unfortunately, I will be rooting against them pursuant to my patented Sportsfan Prime Directive: when faced with a playoff or championship match in which I have no particular affinity for either team, I always root for the underdog. No exceptions. If I don't have a stake in either team, I'm going with the one no one expects to win. That's just how I roll. Accordingly, my Super Bowl prediction is: Bears: 31
Colts: 28
Regardless of who wins the Super Bowl, however, I would like to request that the victor be banned from giving any thanks to God, Jesus Christ, Allah, or any other appellation of our Creator. The Holy Spirit has told me that God doesn't give two quasars about who wins the Super Bowl or any other sporting event. Indeed, He cares no more about these modern games than He cared about Pok-a-tok, the Mayans' deadly version of soccer, where the winners got to decapitate a leading player or the head coach of the losing team. Talk about sudden death. (Rim shot) The reason? Because they believed that the gods had "fated" his death and the only way to keep the crops a-growin' and the good times a-flowin' was to sacrifice the loser.
See what happens when you mix sports and religion?
6 comments:
But the mayans also believed that to be the one sacrificed after the game was a great honor. The gods had chosen the loosing coach (or player) specifically to appease (and please)them. Can't say that we pay our loosing teams the same respect. Instead, we all jump on the winner's bandwagon with parades and championship t shirts being sold on QVC almost the second the ticker runs out. Maybe we should provide a little more respect to those who play gallantly but fall a smidge short... and maybe - just maybe, we too can get a good corn crop out of it! ;)
:)
Sounds like someone's been talking to Kirk Cameron.
Why does the text size on your blog look different? If you changed it on purpose, I dislike it.
Change it I did and on purpose it was. Remember Shan, it's not the size that matters, it's how you use the words.
Now that you mention it, perhaps it's the rich tradition of beheading the loser that helps explain why some South Americans still feel the need to execute members of their own national futbol teams after a game-costing play in the World Cup. Wonder what that'd do for NFL quarterback ratings?
I think we would probably have better quarterbacks across the board, and maybe the Raiders would be paying attention to the draft for a change instead of looking at Michael Vick.
FYI: I reduced the text size a bit because I heard from one of my fabulous Scottish readers that the video games were not fitting properly on the page. That was clearly unacceptable. Shan, feel free to send me flowers.
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